At My Father’s Arrows, we believe that every child is powerful and full of potential. In the child of trauma, their strengths may be difficult to see due to the negative behaviors that they developed while surviving hurts that they sustained early in life.
We are a trauma-informed private placement children’s home for boys and girls who have been abused, neglected, abandoned, rejected, or are otherwise struggling with the impact of their traumatic experiences. These children are often struggling with negative behaviors, rebellion, academic issues, and dysfunctional attachments. We provide the 24-hour supervision, high structure, and low relational pressure that the children of trauma need in order to thrive. We utilize the TBRI model of parenting with focus on faithfully meeting the needs behind behaviors. We provide consistency in responding to behaviors with correction based on Christian values while making the world small for the children in a comfortable, residential farmstead setting. We focus on educational excellence, spiritual growth, and a healthy lifestyle with an abundance of recreation.
Situated on 20 rural acres, our Children’s Home,affectionately called “Mama’s House”, is for boys and girls from hard places, ranging in age from birth to 17. This property not only has our Children’s Home, but also a Farm and School for the children. Intuitively old fashioned, “Mama’s House” reminds us all of that safe place that brings us comfort and makes us feel welcome. The goal of “Mama’s House” is healing, stability, and sanctuary for the children and families we serve. “Mama’s House” provides a nurturing, loving Christian home to vulnerable children until it is safe and healthy for them to return to their families, until they find their forever adoptive homes, or until they are ready for independence as equipped young adults.
We understand how hard it is for your child to learn with all the behavioral/emotional struggles that they have. At our year-round trauma-informed school, Veritas Mission Academy, we take the time to meet your child’s individual needs and learning style. Each child receives an entrance exam to evaluate where they are academically. We are able to work one on one with each of the children and help them succeed at their own pace. We are able to help them process their emotions when seat work becomes frustrating, allow them to take breaks to regroup, and provide them ability to move while learning.
Our farm is another piece of our holistic, trauma-informed sanctuary. Not only does the farm produce healthy foods for our children, but it also provides a therapeutic environment where children thrive. In addition to the horticulture, we also have some animals on the farm. Horses, goats, chickens, sheep, and our friendly service dog, Coco, bring many smiles and comfort to the children with hurting hearts. We know that animals, sunshine, and a healthy garden can bring so much joy and comfort to children, and we love watching them grow in it.
To the parents and legal guardians who are struggling:
We know that this is not the way you thought your adoption would turn out. You felt a calling to adopt a child. You spent so much time investigating the process, going to the classes, navigating the paperwork and praying over your future son or daughter. You couldn’t wait to be a parent! You wanted to rescue your child from a hard situation. When you were finally able to bring your precious child home you were so excited! Your family had grown, and you looked forward to getting to know each other and making many wonderful memories. Sadly, you may not have not been told everything about your child and their struggles, or you didn’t feel as prepared as you needed to be to handle their trauma related behaviors…your child’s heart was deeply hurt early in his or her life, and they struggle to trust grownups.
So many losses… Things may have gone smoothly at first, your child seemed to be loving, charming, and engaged towards you. Over some time, your child’s behaviors started to escalate as they began to push you away when they felt too close to you and things seemed too calm. Your son or daughter demonstrated negative behaviors as an effort to not love or trust you, because all the other grownups in their lives had let them down. It didn’t matter if you explain that you are their forever parents—- the actions associated with that word have not been safe in the past. Mamas are typically the main target and daddies often don’t understand why mama is having such a hard time getting along their new, long awaited son or daughter.
We know that it is really hard to understand a child that had to live with inconsistent caregivers, general instability, hunger, pain, rejection, neglect in their early childhood. Parents can feel so defeated and ill equipped to handle the behaviors that developed as a result of trauma.
We are here to help.
During your child’s time in our program, they will be working on developing:
- Felt Safety
- Healthy Relationships
- Submission to Authority
- Healthy Boundaries
- Life Skills
- Educational Confidence
- Understanding of Choices and Effects
- Positive Character Attributes